Do you ever feel this way? Like, your life and everything you say and do is being watched VERY closely? Too closely? This winter has been L-O-N-G! Every winter is long for someone like me who loves sunshine and warmth and flip flips! We have been "stuck" inside more days than I care to count and with each day we're couped up, I feel more and more like I am under the watchful scrutiny of 2 little, yet, overly observant detectives. How will I handle ANOTHER snow day? ANOTHER day of dress-up? ANOTHER tea party? ANOTHER re-enactment of Superman overpowering Batman who just beat up the Hulk? ANOTHER play-doh creation? ANOTHER painting session? They watch me so intensely and imitate me to a "T" that it is scary, a little flattering, but mostly scary. Am I warping them for life? Am I teaching them what's important? Am I instructing them with love and patience? Are they picking up my bad habits and poor attitude along with the good stuff? I think that all this bad weather is forcing me to sit (with lots of coffee mind you) and think. Think about this job of parenting and this responsibility. I don't want to think. It makes me feel guilty. It makes me feel blessed too. Blessed that I have 2 small warm bodies to snuggle and read books with on cold snowy days. Blessed to have little helpers who love to help me cook and clean. There is no doubt that we have made more fun memories this winter than previous ones. I was looking back at all the pictures I have taken since the holidays and there are SO many good ones of us "just hanging out." As a matter of fact that has become Parker's phrase of choice. When I ask what he wants to do or what his favorite part of the day is, he always says, "Oh... just hanging out with our family." Hanging out. That is what we have done on a consistent basis around here for the past 3 months. It's been fun. It's been a blessing. It's been refreshing. But I need a hanging out break! Before I start complaining and whining about all of this snow and ice and my kids imitate me and make me feel bad about my lousy attitude.
Lord, hurry up and send Spring... or at least a broken pair of binoculars.
4 comments:
Nicole, I found your blog through another link & just wanted to comment that I have enjoyed reading it. I wish that I had as much faith that you have. You are a Godly woman, I admire your strength & honesty. I hope Spring comes quickly for your family
Wow someone just left you such a sweet comment- See, people besides your kiddos are watching you and think you are doing a great job as a mommy. I know winter can make you crazy but it is some of the most creative days for my kids- days when they can stay in their pjs all day and not be rushed. I know its hard because I feel snappier this time of year but we will make it- Just wish we couldmake it together :(
awww. thanks anon.I am always suprised at the random people that stop by and read my silly blog:) Your encouragement was needed and appreciated today!
Heather, snappy is putting it nicely. I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling like that these days. You are right though, this has been a season of creativity in our house. We have learned more about playdoh and it's properties than I will share in this forum (did you know it gets super slimy in the bathtub?)Another post for another day:)
I wish we could be bored and snappy together too. I think that has been the hardest thing about this winter: No close friends to share life with on a regular basis. Moving is never easy but it seemes extra tough during the winter. Just leaning on Jesus a little more often (which is never a bad thing!)
love you and miss you!
I definitely have some binoculars following me around the house on a regular basis, and I am sure that they are seeing so many things that aren't the most positive or Godly at times. I find myself praying more and more about being a better model for my children, especially as I strive to find confidence in Him and not my appearance (I used to say, "I'm so fat", "I wish I was thin. . ."). I want my girls to feel confident, no matter their size, that God loves them and wants to be their friend. Wow, deep stuff for a Wed. afternoon! ha!
Love you!
Post a Comment